But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. For he himself is our peace, who has made us both one and has broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility... Eph. 2:13-14

Wednesday, February 25

Choose Wisely

Just a few moments ago, I decided to do something I never do and listen to music while I study. I actually don't usually listen to music unless I can enjoy it or I'm driving. Anyway, I opened iTunes, started the song Prestidigitation (both because it's a soundtrack song and because I like the name) and got back to work.

A very few songs later, shuffle wound up in the Caedmon's Call section and started the song Manner and Means. I was just about to click next, when I listened to the first line for the first time in a long time: "The heart is a lonely thing to lose in the dead of the night."

Usually I just nod and either go on with life or go on to the next song. Yes, that's nice, so true, but that's not a big issue right now, and I'd rather listen to something more upbeat or something. Not today. For various reasons, losing your heart has been on my mind a lot for the past few days. I've seen in a new light both how easy it is to do, and how terribly it can hurt when the heart that you gave is broken.

So when iTunes suddenly gave me a mournful-sounding voice singing of losing her heart, I was intrigued. I immediately looked up the lyrics, and what I found was so shockingly applicable to me that I felt that I had to share them.

The heart is a lonely thing to lose in the dead of night
The heart is a sad thing to lose in the throws of a fight
The heart is the match to the fire
And the embers of desire, to keep it burning

I am a shell of the manner and the means
Mine is a story of nothing as it seems
But when we have come this far
And still don't know who we are, does it keep burning?

When it's over, and you see it with your eyes
Would you rather have the truth or a lie?

I call for angels to breathe holy on this rust
I call the snakes to come out slowly from the brush
I need a massive overhaul
A revival to fall, to keep it burning

The heart is a costly thing to sell in the prime of the years
And my heart is thinly veiled in the usual fears
The heart is the dream, and the kiss
That there could be more than this, to keep it burning

When it's over, and you see it with your eyes, would you rather have the truth or a lie? Very often I'd rather have a lie. It's so easy to let your heart go after a mirage, so easy to blind yourself to every flaw until you've painted for yourself someone completely unlike the person you've given your heart to.

Well, that's all I have for now. Maybe I'll expound on this further at a later time. I'd like to clarify that I know that eventually there will be someone to whom I can give my heart to, and I'm eagerly awaiting that day. Until then, though, I can't throw my love to every guy I see. That's pretty much all I'm trying to say. Again, I must stress that you don't have to worry about me, I haven't had my heart broken. ;)

1 comment:

Rebekkah said...

I'd like to further clarify that I spoke rather certainly of what is not certain. I said that I know that there's a guy out there for me, but I don't know that. I could very well remain single the rest of my life. Judging by the way I've turned out so far, it seems likely that God does have someone out there for me. Likely, but not certain.
This is a rollercoaster of acceptance for me. Right now, I can see where I would be happy alone and able to focus solely on Christ. In the next five minutes, I'll probably have to struggle back to this level of trust. My life is God's. I gave it to Him, and now it's my job to see what He's going to do with it and be happy with what I'm dealt. Thankfully, I know that all that He gives me is for my ultimate good. It may not be easy, but it is good.